Friday, September 13, 2013

My people

I spent some time with my baby sister today.  I don't think I've introduced her to you yet.  Well, here she is holding my youngest. A'int she purdy?



Anywho, we hung out today and it did my heart good. She visits me at my office sometimes and we chat, catch up on life. Although we currently live in the same town and even go to the same church, we still miss things, events, happenings in each other's lives. So, I cherish these times. Today, we even had lunch together. We joked and laughed - mainly at ourselves. We talked a little about the past and a little about the future. All this over a couple of sandwiches, a bag of salt & vinegar potato chips and a chocolate chip cookie. Amid the uproar of the dozens and dozens of others sharing meals and lives and moments together.

You know what I realize after this time with my sis? That we all need people. You know what I mean. People. The ones that remind you where you came from. The ones that accept you just as you are. The ones that want and hope the best for you but never make you feel bad about yourself when you're not quite measuring up. People.

I'm blessed to have several such people. Time with these folks makes me feel centered and certainly inspired. I'm inspired because of their love and acceptance. Because of their perspective on me and my life that's never as harsh as my own.

There are so many times when I'm in a "mode" (work mode, mom mode, etc). Times when I feel like the expectations are so daunting. When I'm with my people though, I don't feel that way. I feel like me. Like I'm ok in my own skin. That's something to treasure. And I do.

Happy Friday to you all!

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Busyness

I've been on an accidental hiatus from blogging recently.  With the start of a new school year, I just got busy and neglected to make the time to write.  Things have slowed now though.  At home, we're pretty well adjusted to a new weekly schedule and the back-to-school frenzy has subsided at work too.  So here I sit with a few moments to myself thinking about how long it's been since I've written anything.

I love to write.  Have I told you that?  Well, I do.  Writing is therapeutic for me.  It makes me think.  It forces me to string together all the random thoughts bouncing around in my head to form some sort of coherence.

Here are my thoughts for today:  Why do I feel the need to be busy all the time?  Why do I equate busyness with importance?  I mean, not all busy people are important people. And there are lots of very important people who aren't busy. Maybe it's a societal thing. The stereotypical American woman who can "do it all." I'm not sure when I bought into that.

I like to be busy, productive, efficient.  Too much downtime is frustrating and even depressing for me.  But, I want my busyness to be worth something.  I guess what I'm saying is I want to be busy with things that  matter. I want to be able to look past the frustrations of my job and just do my job well.  When I get home, I want to be able to ignore the laundry and dirty floors and just sit and play with my kids.  I want to be able to see myself as more than a completer of tasks.  Although completing things does satisfy me, I want to be able to find satisfaction amid chaos too.

So tonight maybe I won't wipe down the countertops or balance the budget or talk about the upcoming weekend's events.  Maybe I'll read or play Power Rangers or cuddle with my hubby.  Maybe I'll be more than a machine powered by the expectations of others.  Maybe...